I just can't cope :(

Leave a Comment
I feel really bad because I haven't posted anything on here for over a month now. So many things have happened since my last post I celebrated my 20th birthday twice with friends but unfortunately was too ill to have a nice family meal with my parents (which sucks!). The day before my birthday was pretty intense as I had a breakdown in front of my friend at university where I just couldn't control the panic and I don't think she really understood.
Less than 2 weeks ago I had one of the best days with my friends as we went for a lovely meal at Wetherspoons (which is our regular place to eat) and we went to see the Muse movie at the cinema, it was AMAZING! I actually nearly cried because it just reminded me of when we saw them in the Summer and it was a day where I had no worries and I felt really happy! But with good things, bad things also takes place; as later that night my grandad sadly passed away :'( He battled his cancer for years and he was so strong but eventually it took him. 
It's great to know that the support in my family is so strong and my friends are always there for me, but recently I just can't help but worry. Panic attacks are emerging all the time especially this week and I just feel like crying which I guess is normal. I don't know I just feel really down most days since I have a few deadlines coming up, I have to do my uni presentation next week, the funeral is getting closer and I'm even considering whether I actually like my course at university! 

Anyway I'm trying my hardest to start again and get through this by using my reading week (which I'm on now) to be productive. I believe that all this stuff which I need to sort out is causing me to have these panic attacks again and making me feel miserable. I'm also thinking about the good things which I did recently such as seeing Vampire Weekend in Leeds last weekend. I've started drinking camomile tea again as well to help with relaxation. The fact that Christmas is coming up soon, makes me happy too as this means watching cheesy American Christmas films on Christmas24!
To end this on a good note I'll add some lovely pictures which makes me smile :)
Thanks for reading! xxx

Next PostNewer Post Previous PostOlder Post Home


Post a Comment

Contact Form


Email *

Message *